Weird food competitions at the park seem to be the new Friday tradition. Last Friday, you might have observed my attempt at eating a tomato. Contrary to popular hypothesis, I did not actually throw up that tomato. I gagged. A lot. And I would have thrown up if I had continued. Instead, I spat it out and chucked it. And that was that.
Today was a McDonalds vanilla cone eat-off with Erin the Organizer and Jessie the Icecreamater. In the video, I referred to Erin as the Devourer. (I cannot say that out loud. I tried three times and bungled it every time.) But Erin the Organizer stands, because she strategically planned out her cone eating agenda. Top, top, side, side, bottom, bottom.
Watch. And be amazed. Be very amazed.
I laugh every time I watch this for a few reasons:
- Jessie is adorable. I got beat by a 7 year old.
- Erin is FIERCE. I had no idea what I was dealing with. You can tell that by my passive Mary Poppins around-the-cone eating pattern that I chose. What was I thinking. She was T-Rex eating rabbit whole. You can almost hear the bones crunching.
- Things are popping out all over on Erin’s face due to the intense focus. It’s intense. Watch it more than once.
- I went on with my Mary Poppins thing long after she had won. Dummy.
- My son, Mamasboy, is loitering in the background. What must he think of me and of his upbringing? I should ask him. Except I’m afraid of what he’ll say.
- The Informinator was betting on Erin. Traitor.
- Two others were rooting for Jessie. Whatever.
Same time next Friday for a Food Off.