Apparently Nyquil is not my only problem. I seem to have a largish crush on caffeine. And since I was unintentionally separated from my crush for 2 days, my head began to throb like a finger in a car door. Man oh man. I am now hooked up to an IV with Diet Mtn. Dew in La Quinta Room 239. That isn’t my actual room number, Stalkers, and I’m not really hooked up to an IV. But I am drinking one and hoping it works wonders very soon. Someday I will tackle the caffeine monster. Today I am just attacking the symptom. Forgive me.
Brendan Fraser is incapable of starring in a movie that doesn’t make adults want to vomit. I’m watching some sort of horrific piece of “art” that mixes cartoons with actual humans. Since Who Framed Roger Rabbit, I have not been able to cope with this genre of movie. Yosemite Sam cannot bite into a DiGiorno. It just can’t happen. I don’t want to pretend to believe in this. But Brendan Fraser makes more $ on one very bad film than I will see in a lifetime. So I guess there’s that.
I love Tallahassee. Love. It. I feel a future post coming on.
I’ve decided to celebrate the arts in awkwardly passionate ways. Coming soon.
Also, the Informinator just Instant Messaged me a challenge. She is challenging me to a taste test between a real Diet Mtn. Dew and Winn Dixie’s version. I know she feels victorious already, because in a past taste test of four diet drinks, I got every last one of them wrong. This is entirely due to the temperature of the drinks. They were warm. Who drinks warm soda? Mr. and Mrs. Informinator do. At 70 degrees, there is no good or bad. They are all flat and disgusting. At any rate, here is the challenge:
Informinator: Currently drinking a Kountry Mist. That would be Winn Dixie’s own version of Mt. Dew.
Me: Oh my. I don’t think I’d admit to that.
InFRMTR: It was $2.50/12 pack. I will challenge you to a taste test.
Me: HA HA! I ACCEPT YOUR CHALLENGE WITH CAPS LOCK!!!!
Me: Monday, shall we say? Get one frosty.
INFR: Oh, it’s on like Donkey Kong.
Me: I can’t drink them warm or tell anything about anything with warm soda. My buds shut down at 44 degrees.
IN: Shall I also bring Freshy (fresca), Dr. Check (dr. pepper) and Check Zero (coke zero)?
Me: Indeed. See you then. Prepare to lose the challenge and your very last strand of dignity and self-pride.
And now I’ve gone public with this, which means I have no shot at winning. Also, I have no idea what “it’s on like Donkey Kong” means. But it sounds cool.