I just read my posts from early January. Not because I was bored, but because I was pretty sure I had switched horses in the middle of the stream.
I talked a big game about intentions, roads to Hell, surviving until Valentine’s Day. I did mean it. I always mean it. But as usual, there were things. In March there was that whole spring break thing. In April there were allergies and doctors. In May, I began the awkward process of screwing everything up at the end of the school year and spent the rest of my time trying to drum up acceptable excuses for it.
My goals were to parent better, get healthy, save money, and be more efficient. Oh, me. Silly me. I guess I could be considered healthier in some lesser-known countries. Places where the water supply is tainted and the women are fluffy. And I guess you could say I saved money, until the field trip money was due and I raided the jar. And I guess you could possibly say I got more efficient, because I now keep my extra garbage can liners under the current bag of garbage in the can. I mean, that saves all KINDS of time and effort.
But around 1 Kings 4, my bible reading dropped off…no offense to the Kings. And I haven’t yet met any viable fitness goals. In that sense, I am tempted to call it a failed experiment, blow off the rest of the year, and start over on January 1, 2017. That would be the path of least resistance.
I really don’t think I want to do that. I think it can be saved. A thing is only dead when you allow it to die. A dream is only dead if you walk away from it. A goal, a hope, a mapped-out plan for the future…only dead if I turn my back. And I haven’t done that yet. It’s summer. It’s the half birthday of my resolutions. And by George, I don’t have to quit yet.
Most of my goals are the same as they were on January 1. They are just as important to me now as they were then. But I added a big one, which is the mid-stream horse switcheroo. I started my novel. The one that’s been in my head for 2 years. I’m 5 chapters in and loving the process 115% more than I expected I would. Some people would say that it’s dumb to add a HUGE goal into a mix of failing goals. If you are already struggling to run the 5K, don’t sign up for a half marathon the same weekend. People who say such things are smart people.
I’m not those people.
So the novel is on the list. And the other stuff stays on the list. Making new lists is on the list.