If I could just finish this book I’d get back to posting here. And I will. So much is going on. Todd is remodeling the place we’ll soon be moving to. If we run out of cash before we finish, I thought about pitching a “sponsorship” program on here. You send me $1000 and we’ll mount your name in the family room. Or the porch. Or the hallway. The Informinator says I have to post more than once every month to six weeks for this plan to work. Also, I have to be more likable. Oh well.
Because there wasn’t enough going on, I hopped over to see what was happening in CNN’s little bubble. What a depressing little crypt those writers must live in. Do you think we’d get out of the recession if we just didn’t talk about it so much and with such gloom? Everything is negative. The stock guys just sit in their sackcloth and ashes and wait for a phone call about jobs going bad. And then they all have a good cry together before deciding they should flush all their stocks down the swirlie. More waiting. More crying. More flushing. Then someone says, “It won’t get better for TWO YEARS!” like Paul Revere riding and shouting, “The British are coming! The British are coming!” So, of course, we should cry and moan and flush for two years before we wash our faces and get up and smile about what we DO have.
Sheesh-kabobs. It’s like staring at a really ugly wart and writing a 5-paragraph essay about it. It doesn’t make it go away. It doesn’t teach anyone anything. It’s just a 5-paragraph essay about a nasty wart. Now go do something else.
- Stocks fall on jobs news CNNMoney
- WH: Expect slow recovery CNNMoney
- 8 in 10 think we’re in a recession – Oh, good. Well, that settles it then. Ever heard of the 12 spies of Israel? Yeah, I didn’t think so. Enjoy wandering…
- Granny, grad fight for jobs Yikes. I’d hate to see this cat fight.
- Gergen: How Obama can lead on jobs
- U.S. warned to be ‘vigilant’ on 9/11
- No help for some 9/11 responders
- Big storm threatens South | LIVE
- Katia upgraded to hurricane again
- Dad tells of Irene flood terror
- Martin: Obama’s not scary enough – Oh, yes he is.
- Labor Day kicks off 2012 sprint Time
- Bachmann faces new challenge in Iowa – Here’s her first problem. She’s in Iowa. No one really lives in Iowa. This is a fake state. Write that one up, CNN.
- Ticker: Tea Party vs. Tea Party?
- GOP raffles gun in Giffords’ district
- New purpose for rejected shelter dogs – I hope it is sychronized swimming.I would buy tickets to that.
- Mom with buggy hits rattlesnake
- Space junk at ‘tipping point’?
- Bad news for September baseball SI
- Outrage over Chaz Bono on ‘DWTS’ I do NOT want to know.
- Kim Kardashian ready for kids People
- Should your pet be in your will? No. It should not.
Missy’s Top Twelve Ways to Be Happy Even if 8 out of 10 people think we are recessed and depressed.
- Eat a warm donut.
- Bake something for someone. Unless you are like me and your baking skills stink. If you are like me, do not do this one. It will further depress you. You could tweak #1 and buy a warm donut for a friend.
- Find a big, ugly hat and wear it. Maybe it’s a Parksdale Farms old man baseball cap like Spemma tries and fails to rock. Maybe it’s a turkey headress. But wear it proudly. It will make you smile.
- Read Matthew 5. Let your light shine. You have one. We all do. Now go shine it.
- Jog. Even if you look like Hospice should be running with you, it will boost your mood. I’m pretty sure this is how I look when I run, but I don’t care.
- Play trash can basketball with a 3 year old. Then bean her with the ball a couple of times. If she doesn’t cry, your mood will soar! If she does cry, you shouldn’t do that beaning thing anymore. My daughter LOVED the dodgeball element of our game this morning and laughed like a maniac every time the ball hit her.
- Use a soft ball in #6. Definitely use a soft ball. (Not a softball, mind you. A soft ball.)
- Ruin a song with an operatic voice and sing it through to the end. This works better if your kids are present, subjected to the torture, and begging you to “knock it off.” It’s a mood lift regardless. But it’s better if your kids are ashamed of you as you do this. I’ve found KidzBop tunes to work perfectly for this. Also makes the kids twice as crabby to hear you ruin a perfectly good, already-ruined song. It’ll be another 15 years before they understand this. No matter. I can wait.
- Sing a hymn at the top of your lungs. Don’t ruin this one. That’s disrespectful.
- Sing Battle Hymn of the Republic while marching. I DARE you to feel sad after doing this one.
- Take a four hour nap on the couch. It works.
- Pray. This one isn’t really number 12. It’s all of them. Don’t forget this one. Sometimes I do.
Don’t believe everything CNN says if you happen to be dumb enough to follow their news (as I am). They don’t know. If they had a warm donut, a game of trash can bball, and a prayer life, they might be writing different stuff.
5 thoughts on “Live from Gooberville”
Thanks for the tips 🙂 Hope you feel better…and in the mean time you should probably have a warm donut. (Then jog so it’s like you never had the donut.)
I should not read in the morning till my brain is truly awake because “warm doughnut” was a “worm doughnut” and for the longest I couldn’t figure why it was at the top of the list…or even on the list.
You can cook, you made me some delish chili after surgery and brought it over.
Been with ya when you did. 3 : )
Nice to read you again and hope you are better soon!
Missy, you really crack me up. Loved this post. 🙂 Jennifer
You are right! News is depressing! I chalk it up to 24 news programs having to fill the space!
You are nuts in a good way! That is precisely why I don’t watch the news! I read the headlines, find out if we are still called the U.S.A., check the weather, and move on to the list. I have my own, but it doesn’t start with eat a wormy donut! I am not really into worms or donuts, so that doesn’t work for me.
My list includes smiling dimples on small cheeks, cool breeze with warm sunshine on my face, and listening to the river with birds singing in the trees.